Sarah Reese shares the joys and surprises of living in Paris.
“You’re walking too loudly,” my fiery Spanish downstairs neighbor roared at me and my flatmate. “I’m going mad here,” she continued, “I can’t sleep, I can’t work, I’ve even looked into renting another apartment because you both WALK too LOUDLY!” Smoke billowed out of her ears, her eyes blazed in anger, and her high-pitched rant continued, suggesting we should go out and buy some slippers and tiptoe across our floor instead of walk.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Paris and the joys of apartment living. (I admit this is probably not one of the most intellectual articles I have ever written, but I seriously need to get this off my chest.)
After having moved out of my apartment and away from the raging Andalusian bull, this story had slipped to the back of my mind after three months of two-storey luxury in Wellington, New Zealand. However, on my return to France, my patience was once again put to the test after we received a knock at the door one morning. There, at our doorstep, was our building’s guardian. “I’m here following a number of complaints we’ve received in the last few days,” she said sternly, “about the…towels you have been drying on your window-sill.”
Caught in the act: Towel drying in Paris!
I look at her blankly.
I stood there in silence, half-expecting Ashton Kutcher to jump in and say I’ve been Punk’d. He didn’t show. “The towels?!” I finally exclaim. “Yes. We really can’t have anything showing on the window-sill I’m afraid. It is a very poor image for our building,” she explained, “It is, of course, in the contract.” Ah, the contract…how silly of me to have missed such a crucial part of our living arrangements!
It didn’t end there. The following day, World War III broke out. I was in the kitchen washing up from breakfast when I heard someone from the footpath yell up to my boyfriend at our first-floor window. I could hear a muffled argument taking place and wondered what on earth it could be about this time (seeing I had already dried the towels on the clothes-horse that morning.) It was worse than I ever expected. This time, we were being treated like felons for having our (drum roll please…) pots of herbs on the window-ledge. (OH. MY. GOD.) “They’re not secure there!” an ancient member of our apartment block shrieked from the footpath. After being questioned on this, this little old man (and he is little…) explained that as soon as it rains, they could “easily fall and hurt a passerby.” “But we paid a lot for these and we intend on using them,” my boyfriend explained (relatively calmly, I must say.) “Well,” continued Old Man, “you’ll pay a lot more for a life…”
The deadly herb pots!
Okay, so let’s explain the herb situation a bit better… As you can see by the attached photo, we have three pots of herbs (thyme, parsley, and basil if you must know) sitting on our window ledge. In front of these pots is the bar of our metal shutters, ensuring they do not fall. And in front of that bar, we have twenty-eight centimeters before the ledge drops off to the street below. But here he is, telling us that our innocent little pots of culinary delights could easily jump the bar, walk twenty-eight centimeters, then drop and kill someone. And pigs can fly.
What I don’t get about all this is that we consider ourselves exemplary neighbors; we don’t have parties (well, not many), we don’t have children, we don’t have animals, we don’t smoke, we recycle, we attend (and bring food to) the annual Fête des Voisins, and well, we don’t walk that loudly either. Why is it then that we feel like such criminals in our own home?! And also…do they have nothing else to do with their time than inspect our window-sills. Pfft, seriously.
No towels and no herbs; an exemplary Parisian apartment block.
I discussed my frustration with a friend over lunch the other day. Funnily enough she was not at all surprised by the carry-on at our place. “You should see the madam who lives below me!” she laughed, “I was vacuuming my apartment one day just after lunch, and she turned up and forbade me to vacuum, explaining that she works night shifts and needs to sleep during the day.” I beg your pardon?!
After pondering about this for a while, I wondered briefly whether this petty nonsense was just a French thing, or does this come with any sort of apartment living? I’m curious…have you had any bad experiences with your neighbors? If so, make sure you share your stories with me so I know I’m not alone.
Look I better go, someone’s at the door. It’s probably the guardian…
yikes! tough neighbors!!!
I haven’t experienced bad neighbors renting in Buenos Aires… just a landlord that kicked me out two weeks early for no reason and kept all of my money.
Stephanie you have been lucky with good neighbours, but I hope you found a way of getting back at the landlord!!?
Sounds like the neighbors are pretty picky. Maybe the towels are understandable, but the pots of herbs – that’s pretty ridiculous.
I have not experienced neighbors like this. I’ve been in Asia for the last few years, and pretty much anything goes – one can hang anything anywhere, make noise, or have loud kids without anyone giving any complaint.
Mark, we have an amazing Chinese restaurant on the ground floor of our apartment building and some complain about the smells from there, but once I smell the Peking Duck I just drool!!!
Like Mark, I’ve been in Asia a long time. I’ve been blasted by karoke at all hours of the day and night, had motorbikes revved and tootted outside our living room at all hours of the day and night. I think we had so many bad neighbours!!
Thanks Barbara – you just hope for a little respect when living in apartment buildings!
You are not alone!! Germans are quite capable of that kind of thing too and when I looked at my Miami condo agreement (mind you, I own the place, I don’t even rent) I was pleased to see that I was at least allowed to live in it. No such hassle in Turkey, do as you please. You have inspired me, I might get a few herb pots for my terrace.
Wow! It sounds like a bad neighbor all right. I thought in Europe it was pretty standard to dry your laundry on clotheslines or windowsills?
Michael you may be right about most of Europe drying laundry out their windows, but not here!!!
My cousin who lives in Italy tells me they’re just as bad over there when it comes to windowsills!
I’m guessing it’s less about the walking and the pots and more about youth taking over their territory. We’ve seen both sides – being the victims of those who are just disagreeable and also being the ones who can’t deal with the neighbors who are insensitive to what we feel is right.
I chaulk it all up to c’est la vie!
Keep the herbs, vacuum when you want, wear slippers (their comfy) and smile!
Priscilla you are right! Isn’t it strange how there are people who just set out to be disagreeable – it’s kind of tragic!!
Oh my god – these people would have a field day with the people who live upstairs from my place! They vacuum at midnight, literally stomp around their apartment all the time, and have loud friends over late at night multiple times a week… I shudder to think of what your neighbors would think of them!!
~Sara
It all sounds very curious to me since the complaints seem so petty. Can’t say I’ve had a similar experience (not that I can remember anyway).
Good luck with your neighbors! Thanks for sharing – wish I could help.
Thanks Cathy for your comments! If a delegate of sane minded people is required to fight the building occupants we will contact you!!!!
That is very interesting. I can imagine that it is pretty much similar in most places with apartments. It is because they are not really apart.
Yes a lot of strife can be caused when all these families are living on top of each other in an apartment building – the answer to a peaceful existence is respect!!
Hate to disappoint you John, but we have bad neighbors here too. These seem especially picky though.
We live on the top floor and the first time we had friends visit, after living above our neighbor for over a year without complaints, she began complaining the day after they arrived. She could hear footsteps (everyone was wearing socks or soft flippers), the kid was noisy. She needed to sleep and we were talking too loudly.
After the first complaint, we didn’t know what to do – stop walking? Highly unlikely. It made me feel uncomfortable. My husband didn’t care. He felt he had a right to enjoy his apartment and our friends. I did try talking to her but it didn’t work. Putting our friends out was not an option. She’d just have to bear it until they left.
We were never best buds, but after that, it was just ‘hi/bye.’ I’d had it.
Let us know if we can help?
Except for the things that could possibly get you evicted, I’d tell the rest of them to all go to hell, haha.
Thanks Matt – sort of the Gadaffi approach!! Mind you it’s easy to feel like that at times.
My only suggestion is to drink lots of wine!
In the U.S. I’ve had my fair share of awful neighbors… but they were the ones being obnoxiously noisy and I was the one fuming! We once had someone live above us who would get up at 6 in the morning for work and then put on high heels and walk around the entire apartment while she got ready. The floors were hardwood, so every beat of her heel against the floor echoed alllll the way down. I don’t think I ever complained, but I did entertain way too many dreams of throwing her heels off the balcony.
From the other comments, not sure if I could live in Asia with all the noise. =)
Thanks Christy for your comments. It just takes a little respect to get it right in an apartment! There are the upsides too, if you get on with your neighbours! ie when you run out of something in your pantry!!
I don’t have any neighbour-war stories to share but my God – the IRONY of an Andalusian asking ANYBODY to keep the noise down…
Robin, it sounds like the Andalusians like a good party (noise included therefore!). Have you learnt in Spanish “shut the hell up!!
That and worse, John – but I´m too mild mannered to use the really juicy language…
Passing by reading your blog, have to say, annoying neighbors are everywhere. My next door use to have this old lady that tried to sue us for backyard’s fence when we were repairing the house, and called the police because our guest one time parked at the street parking in front of her house….(I mean, isn’t street parking public to anyone?)
If towel drying on the balcony is not encouraged at your place, I think those people will faint if they ever visit Asia…people dry their clothes, bras, underwear at their front yard XD.
I’m fortunate, I never have to experience that.
Yes, there are difficult neighbors everywhere, some time they are like that for personal reasons (late shifts….) or maybe there are some implicit rules that we ignore…
Whatever…!now I’m living in a condo with nice neighbors.